I know I know I said I wouldn't leave you for the other blog. I haven't...exactly I've just been soooo darn busy it's been ridiculous. And as promised I'd still keep this blog for my personal things. SO you ready for this one?
My mother is over in Western Washington this week. Yup a mere 5 hours away. When she told me she was going over for her sisters birthday party i was like "wait aunt janet is having a birthday party? ummm well i would've liked to have made it over" it was then that my mom told me simply i wasn't invited. hmmmm umm what? At first mom told me that its because aunt janet had too many friends coming over for the party. ok i get that i understand but well part of the reason I moved up here was to get closer to my family again. Heck I would've made the 5 hour drive just to drop by for 5 minutes to see everyone.
Yet aunt janet is no longer on my facebook. Why you ask well because after the last year of seeing her comment on the other neice and nepherws statuses and never on mine or in fact never even when I wrote on her wall would she reply back I figured it was just time to delete her. I haven't talked to her in prolly two years. I got tired of me always being the one to make the phone calls so yeah....
I knew what this was about. She doesn't approve of how I live my life. She hasn't ever since I told her i was pregnant with my third child. Even at Reed's funeral it wasn't an I'm sorry for your loss from her it was more of a sense of relief from her.
I asked mom if she asked her WTF was up. Since I'm planning on heading over to that area in September thought I might as well figure out if it's worth visiting her or not. Mom told me that after me being sick last year she just couldn't take my drama anymore. That she still loved me and had lots of nice memories of me as a child. UMMMMM hello? SHE couldn't take my drama anymore neither could I hence the move hence wait a minute...my illness of last year was too much for her?
Try my kids who still are afraid to hug me because it might hurt. Try me who had to live through not knowing what te heck was wrong with me. Try the fact I thought I really would lose my kids over my illness.
So to you aunt janet I'm soooo sorry if i haven't lead the perfect life that you think I should've I'm sorry I've been divorced twice(umm your brother has been married 4 times and your marriage hasn't been perfect) I'm sorry if I chose to have more than the "normal" 2.5 children. I'm sorry I've been through more than my fair share of pain in my adult life that you can't bare to support me through. Kenna heard what you said about the drama(she was listening when i didn't know) and her first response was "too much for her!!! that's really selfish" hmmm guess I'm raising my kids the wrong way too huh?
uggg i'm just beyond dsigusted with my mom's side of the family right now. saying she has fond memories of me. WTF did I die? Well you know what through my drama I have learned who I do and don't have time for in my life and you aunt janet are MORE drama and I don't have time for you...
There now I feel a little better. yikes yeah for family